frog in training

whoa.

what is brave? i think
she's a coward. take some
risks.

words from 3 directions.

they give me that flight or flight feeling.

(yes, i know i repeated myself.)

they make my heart beat faster.

i almost feel like i'm about to cry.

my body wants to pace in circles.

my head says it would rather curl up into an invisible little ball.
and roll under the bed.
to hide.

i don't choose to fight.

it just happens.

even when i want to fly.

especially when i want to fly.

east, west and south.

notice...

north is missing.

north is the direction.
it's where we find ourself when we are lost.
on the road. in life.

north is courage.

north is guts. and boldness.

(sprinkled with a little bit of selective-selective memory, for good measure.)

north is belief in myself.

north is worthiness to accept the rewards.
and dignity to face the criticism.

north is knowing that none of that matters.
then adding a cup or 2 of gratitude, anyway.

this north cannot be found.
it needs to just be known.

once north is known

you can find your way out of

...or into...

anything.
anywhere.

i do know

(....in that know in your head, but can't/won't accept it into your heart kind of way...)

that learning to know north is part of my journey.

where can I buy a box of courage?
where's that wizard when you need him?